The Romance Woes of Mystery Inc
by Gothicthundra
Summary: When Shaggy, Velma, Daphne & Fred have relationship issues, who do they rant too. Scooby-Doo of coarse!


**NOTICE::: **This in **NO WAY **has anything to do with my other stories.

**The Relationship Woes of Mystery Inc.**

**Shaggy**

** Scooby sat on the couch peacefully. Normally he didn't hang out on the couch too much because everyone was always on it, but today, everyone was out... doing something. It was eight o'clock at night and no sounds rang.... Scooby heard Shaggy's jeep come to screeching halt in the driveway, and a car door slam. The door opened and then slammed. Shaggy grumbled as he plopped on the couch.**

"Scoob, I am never dating again. Like, I'm going to live my life alone, die a miserable scrooge of a death, and like totally be eaten by worms... or something," said Shaggy.

"Rhat ras releoramaric." said Scooby, giving him a quizzical look.

"Melodramatic, yes. But like, not without reason man. Every girl I date or that digs me is either a crazy loonatic or a ghoul." said Shaggy, getting up to make a sandwich.

"Ruh Rah," said Scooby, thinking about Shaggy's relationships.

"Googie, a voodoo witch. Sadie May, a loonatic gone evil. Vanapira, Dracuala's wife. Crystal, an alien. Then there was that zombie, the serial killer...." Shaggy began to count off on his fingers.

A half an hour later, Scooby regretted questioning Shaggy's thoughts. Because after hearing about around over sixty crazy girls or ghouls, Scooby-Doo had a head ache. He heard Shaggy sigh and tuned back in, he was talking about tonight's date, the one that seemed to have put him over the edge.

"So, like, at first I thought my date really was blind, but then I realized she could see everything despite the sun glasses. It was going like totally groovy. Then we went on the club dance floor, and this other girl hit on me, I'm like totally 99.9% sure she was a vampire. I declined but the girl flipped..." Scooby cut it.

"Realoury ris rot rhat rad." said Scooby.

"Jealousy I could handle. A gorgon, I can not. She like totally took off her sunglasses and the chick turned to stone. It was like then where I decided this... and ran out of the club. Since she picked it, guess where we were?" asked Shaggy, eating a sandwich.

"R'a ronster rub?" asked Scooby.

"Yes, a monster club." said Shaggy, who than proceeded to talk to himself, "Maybe, I like totally adopt."

"Raggy, rould ret rester." said Scooby, sadly.

"I would wouldn't I. Like man, I can't even adopt a kid, because she'll turn out pure evil.... I wouldn't mind adopting a ghoul I guess... but not an evil one." Shaggy was talking to himself again, Scooby shook his head and watched him go up the stairs, he went to close his eyes but he heard a car door slam.

**Fred and Daphne**

** Scooby looked up as Daphne stormed in the house and slammed the door. She was headed upstairs, but saw Scooby instead, and went to the couch. She began to rant about her and Fred's date. Just as Fred came in, equally as mad as her. Their argument stopped with each other and began to try and get their points across to Scooby.**

"He flirted with another girl in front of me!" said Daphne.

"She spilt her drink, I gave her a napkin. On what planet is that flirting!?" yelled Fred, "I wasn't the one... Scooby she started dancing with this other guy."

"Only after you started talking to the little blonde in the corner!" said Daphne, crossing her arms.

"That was my cousin!" yelled Fred.

"If I believe you now, than suddenly every girl you talk to will be your cousin." grumbled Velma.

"Oh for crying out loud! Daphne I wasn't flirting!" yelled Fred in desperation.

"Fine, let's go ask Shaggy if that's flirting?" asked Daphne, "Why's he home so early?"

"Bad date?" asked Fred, looking at Scooby.

"Rad rating rife." said Scooby with a nod.

"Come on!" said Daphne, stomping up the steps. Scooby breathed a sigh of relief until he heard the front door slam open.

**Velma**

"Uhg!" Velma leaned back against the door.

"Rello Relma," sighed Scooby, waiting for the rant.

"I hate men... at least the men I date," sighed Velma, plopping on the couch, "Just because I'm not the most attractive girl, they think they can get in my pants with ease."

"Rour reautirul." said Scooby, eyes wide.

"Thanks Scooby, but your not a man. Most guys rather date a girl like Daph," grumbled Velma.

"Rot r'true." said Scooby, Velma rolled her eyes.

"So it started off nice, as usual. We had dinner, the normal. Than he starts to drive home and his car conveniently runs out of gas. Which is really immature and high schoolish. I was going to call Shaggy to come pick me up right there, than I realized he was on a date. So I didn't, and the guy. grr. " Velma through the couch pillow in frustration.

"Raggy's rome." said Scooby.

"I noticed... alone?" asked Velma.

"Reah. Re's rerited rot roo rate rever." said Scooby.

"Why would he never date again... that bad?" asked Velma.

"Reah." said Scooby.

"Well, I guess I'll go check on him," said Velma, heading up the stairs, "Thanks Scooby."

Scooby sat on the couch waiting, but the upstairs was silent. He sighed, they must be glad he didn't have dates. If he did, who would they come home too, each other. Scooby nodded to himself, when they where all no longer dating, he'd go find a girl, but not now. He heard a crash upstairs... someone had either dropped or thrown something. He got up and retrieved the dust pan, heading up the stairs.

**~FIN~**


End file.
